Monday, June 20, 2011

I hate to say I told you so, but...

You find yourself in a situation where you gave someone advice on how they should proceed in an area of life.  They didn't take your advice.  But they should have, because they turned the other way and got lost.

You find yourself in a situation where someone is misspeaking against you, misrepresenting you. You try to state your case, you try to show truth.  But the person is convincing his hearers.  They take him at his word.  But they shouldn't have, because now the truth is out and the misrepresentation is evident.

You find yourself in a situation where you warned someone of the danger ahead. You saw a real potential of destruction on the horizon, so you set up yellow cautionary tape.  They didn't take your warning. But they should have, because they crossed the tape and are now dealing with the explosion's shrapnel.

You were right.

You want that to be known.

Let it go.

When we come to someone and say, "I really hate to say that I told you so, but..." we really aren't concerned with the other person.  Not at all.

We want to show ourselves as right.  Maybe we want to show ourselves as the better.  Maybe there's a dash of revenge mixed in.

Let. It. Go.

The other person knows the truth of the situation.  They may be avoiding it or denying it, but they know. So don't twist the knife. Let the reality of the situation be enough of a weight on their heart, don't add more to it.

Just start fresh.  Be present.  Come alongside and help.  Don't gloat.

It's counter-cultural.  

It's a way in which we can live in grace with others.

Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.  Pr 18:21

Whoever keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble. Pr 21:23

1 comment:

Sarah said...

You know, a big struggle for me is being gracious to the graceless! Especially those who want to 'tell me so'! Thanks for the encouragement. As laid back as I tend to be (more than anyone I know!), even I need the reminder to just let some things go!